An old idiom reads, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”. That means an interpretation of beauty, etc., will vary according to the perspective of the viewer. If my image of God is an authoritarian, I would probably think His 10 Commandments were arbitrary orders that He would punish those who disobeyed.
However, if my image of God is a benevolent authority who only wants to protect us from pain, I would more likely think His 10 commandments were 10 absolutes, like the law of gravity, that, while in stone, yet were primarily to help us avoid the natural consequences of violating them.
I’ve recently been fascinated when comparing how those in our culture approach a situation where they feel insecure and need to control someone, be it an employee, a patron looking for a car to purchase, a politician seeking try to get a vote, or even a spouse wanting to get their spouse to do something a certain way or have a certain attitude. Common human control methods are a form of physical, emotional, or verbal abuse, shrewdness, or various other forms of manipulation. At home, the habit may be to yell, strike, or throw a tantrum, placing a restraint upon a person to get the family member to do what they want done. I’m sure you get the idea.
Compare such approaches with Jesus, who had the same heart for people His Father had. Fundamentally, Jesus never used pressure or any harsh intimidating techniques common to mankind. Instead, He presented the truth of a better way and helped them see how following His option was more beneficial to them in the long run. He always showed deep respect for others’ ability to choose for him/herself. He let them deal with the outcomes of their bad decisions. I think of the young, rich young man who asked what He needed to do to receive eternal life. Jesus talked briefly with him, then saying if that is what you want, “go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasures in heaven; and come, follow me.” (Matthew 19:21, NKJV) If you noticed, Jesus never did one thing to attempt to coerce him into changing his mind. Nor did He chase after him to explain Himself or convince the young man to follow Him. If you examine Jesus’ methods, He used the same approaches His Father uses on us. He states His case and lets us decide. He confronted Saul, who became Paul, but He did nothing to force him to become His disciple. When Saul/Paul encountered the awe of God’s presence, on his own accord, he elected to follow Jesus’ instructions. Is that how you have approached your children, spouse, neighbor, or whoever? Have you respected the other person enough to ‘put the facts on the table’ and let him/her to make their decision—and honor it even if he/she made a bad choice?
To be transparent, while I have known God is a benevolent authority, I don’t remember thinking His 10 Commandments were anything other than coming from a case-hardened authority figure. If we violated them, He would see that we would be disciplined. It finally dawned me that violating one of the 10 Commandments would not bring His wrath and discipline. Instead, like gravity, He knows if you violate it, He will sadly watch you pay the natural consequences. Consequences serve as a discipline for wrong choices in business, sports, family, or whatever area of life. Remember, even the humanity of God’s Son, Jesus, learned to obey by experiencing the natural consequences. (Hebrew 5:8) How might your learned manipulative skill be used instead of God’s ways with you and me? Could there be a better way for you to approach a hard issue? This perspective has been a challenge for me to process and implement.