Dark Night of the Soul

No, this blog isn’t a spin-off of John of the Cross’ poem or perspective of spiritual life. I had to go to the internet to find the source of that statement. Although the phrase sounds religious, it sounded too far out for me. My version of it was birthed early one morning. It left an encouraging mark on my inner being. So, relax and try to stay with me on this.

In my case, it was a reflection of Connie and my last several years of her dying process. It was the last half of a verse in one of David’s Psalm 30 that was on my mind. “Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning.” Psalm 30:5b (ESV) Notice the contrast is between weeping and joy, not necessarily popularity, or whatever the world defines as success. Joy is not giddiness, irresponsibility or human happiness. Rather, it is an internal good sense of well-being, contentment, hope, value to God. Weeping results from mourning, depression or desperation.

Consider how many Bible characters experienced a dark time of night before experiencing God’s joy in the morning. Joseph first came to my mind. As a teenager, he enjoyed the favor of Jacob, his father. But then his jealousy brothers ushered in his dark time. He suffered not only severe rejection, but the possibility of them killing him and betraying the father he loved. That evolved into being sold into slavery, running from his boss’ sex obsessed wife and ending up in prison, all because he honored his God. Then the Spirit empowered him to interpret his cellmate’s dreams, but then again, forgotten in that depraved penitentiary. The time this took for all this to unfold would have felt like a lifetime to a young man. I suspect at times, he wondered where God was. Finally, light dawned, lifting the darkness by the brilliance of sunshine. But he came out of those dark years as a mature man. Neither he nor God wasted the pain of that darkness.

David experienced similar treatment of brothers, then that of his deranged king. Imagine being a fugitive running for your life from someone you had only tried to bless! Interestingly, David wrote some of his Psalm when running to escape King Saul’s army! That would be like Paul singing in prison. The amazing part to me was the attitude David maintained towards the king, whose insecurities were driving him to mental and emotional madness. Some of his Psalms suggest David wondered where God was. The first part of this verse suggests he thought God was angry with him. But as with Joseph, joy came in the morning and David grew in his faith in God through it all. These men didn’t waste their sorrows.

Job, Paul, even the heathen king, Nebuchadnezzar, went through their very dark times before the sun arose to shine. Nebuchadnezzar, as a heathen king, went from being king to eating grass like an animal. But he then recognized God, and the sunlight returned. Even Jesus had to pass through the darkest of nights, sweating drops of blood before His resurrecting and ascension.

In Connie’s case, she suffered confusion, disappointments, and agonizing physical pain. Those were dark days, for sure. But today, she is basking, worshipping, and rejoicing in the brightness of our trinitarian God’s Heaven. In my case, the dawn of light is slowly dispelling the darkness. I’m eager to experience the fullness of the day that I know will be coming.

So, what kind of darkness have you, or someone you love, been experiencing? Remember, this too shall pass. “I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come?” Psalm 121:1 (ESV)

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