A test I once took classified me as a strategic leader. That is an asset as well a liability. My default has been to first assess what I perceive to be the current reality in front of me then begin to formulate a strategy to either solve the apparent problem or, if things are working inefficiently, try to find ways to improve them. Unfortunately, it is not until I am overwhelmed with too many variables that are totally out of my control, does it occur to me to seek God for His direction. While this pattern is also true of both genders, it is generally thought to be more typical of a male. We instinctively feel a need to fix things while females tend to feel a need to nurture.
Beyond all that the bigger question arises. What is our real motive for seeking God? Do we seek Him only to satisfy our felt need to fix or nurture or maybe provide us a soft cushioned landing in our tomorrow? We all in some measure share in the human anxiety about the future. In this point in time, the anxiety is certainly at higher a higher level as we try to stare into our pandemic filled tomorrow.
I fear that many of us seek to hear God solely as a device for securing our own safety, comfort, and righteousness. If you and I drill down to discover what our fundamental motives are for seeking God, do we find something closer to a form of fear of our future (or that of our children), or is it closer to genuinely longing to know God Himself, His ways, character or truth. If it’s the earlier, such motives reveal we are overly concerned about our self/ego in contrast to having a passion for greater experiential knowledge of the Almighty God. It reminds me of a suiter pursuing a marriage relationship based on how the other person’s wealth, power, prestige or social position would benefit them instead of having a heart-felt love for that person.
Frederick B. Meyer wrote, “So long as there is some thought of personal advantage, some idea of acquiring the praise and commendation of men, some aim of self-aggrandizement, it will be simply impossible to find out God’s purpose concerning us.” Nothing will go right in our effort to hear God if this false motivation is its foundation. God will not cooperate. We must discover a different motivation for seeking God’s will or help in solving our problems—or hearing His frequent whispers.
Frequently, we are our own worst enemy. I’ve learned the quicker I can recognize that I stumbled in this area, and humble myself by confessing that failure to God, the sooner the self-induced pressure to perform subsides allowing me to enjoy His peace. I remember playing a classical song and envisioning myself dancing as a child chasing butterflies in a meadow. I can’t describe the relief and pleasure I experienced. The load of fear of my tomorrow robs me of the childlike trust in God—life most abundant. As you reflect on your current inner thoughts and feelings, do you find yourself anxious or at peace, stressed or like a child chasing butterflies. If it is the earlier, remember that God has provided you a preferable alternative that comes by seeking Him, not His gifts or life insurance, simply His presence.
I have found myself in the same mode of operation in my life. Many times I have acted out of self preservation and enrichment. Fortunately the Holy Spirit has very patiently spoken usually ever so softly and brought back to HIS heart and JOY. Several times the Holy Spirit has quite purposely used his faithful servants to slap me and get my attention. Later after absorbing his will I have been able and thankful for that undeserved priceless love shown me. Possibly with age and some spiritual maturity I am able to see the Lord’s heart and love in a bigger way in my life. Thank to the Lord for these challenging and uplifting thoughts.