Connie’s graduation to Heaven has given me firsthand knowledge of serious grief. I didn’t realize how much I had depended upon her intuitive relationship with the Spirit. Indeed, two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed (Ecclesiastes 4:9, NLT2).
This experience has also positioned me to discover what I now see to be a critical factor in our relationship with our God. (Take a deep breath and relax so you can track with me on this.) Pain, of any sort, typically causes a person to think more about themself than about others, including God. For me, it results in a tendency to think more about my loss than on my attachment to Christ. God insists you must worship no other gods, for the LORD, whose very name is Jealous, is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you (Exodus 34:14, NLT2). Jesus went so far as to say, if you want to be my disciple, you must hate everyone else by comparison—your father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even your own life. Otherwise, you cannot be my disciple (Luke 14:26, NLT2). His point is, while we certainly are to love our spouse and children, our love for God must exceed our love for anything else, including our family. Remember, Jesus said there were two great commandments, and He said the FIRST was … you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength Mark 12:30 (ESV). This was a virtual quotation God gave Moses for those he led. (Deuteronomy 6:5) All means everything that makes you and me who we are—no exceptions. He went on to say the second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these (Mark 12:31, ESV). This means serving God or others (including family) must not usurp the first commandment to love Him. Please keep in mind, this is not an either-or situation, but a both-and one.
God knows there will be times when our human frame can only manage one intense thing at a time, such as crisis or grief. He understands our grief distraction and helps us through it if we will allow Him to do so. The Bible shows us that He focuses on our heart and what our heart finally makes a practice of doing over time.
I have found in the low bounces of my grief, when I am able to get a grip and deliberately lean into reflecting on who God shows Himself to be in His Word and thereby entering His presence, it is not long before being in His presence brings me exceptional comfort, even joy which is like a healing ointment to me. What a relief it is! Why is that? It is because I worship Him first in my situation.
But here is the sobering factor. What about all the other distractions we daily encounter and routinely practice in or life? How often do we allow our favorite hobby or activity, making more money, satisfying a secret habit or even our family to trump our worship time with God? Consider this. God is our king, and we are His servants. Right? So why is it we come asking something from the King instead of truly being His servant and lavishing our worship on Him? Isn’t that backwards to what the Bible teaches? Of course, He wants us to ask of Him, BUT NOT MORE THAN we seek to know, love, and serve Him! Ironically, the enemy of our soul will trick us into substituting ministering for worshipping Him with our heart.
This unique discovery has caused me to reconsider the priority of my intimacy with God. Is my time with Him leading to life-change. Might these words provoke thought for you?