Do the words “I’m sorry” consistently represent how a person feels when they use those words? While parents or an authority often force children to say those words, saying them doesn’t mean they feel it. By the time they are adults, they often use that phrase to appease or otherwise get what they want. So, how does a person know if those who verbalize those words mean them or if they are only using them to appease others? There is something mystical about discerning authenticity.
Authenticity means to be true to your core values, personality, and inner being convictions regardless of adverse circumstances or social pressure. A discerning person will sense if a person is repeating what they’ve learned to say to get what they want, or if their words align with their inner convictions. Those who heard Jesus sensed this invisible virtue in Him because they said He was teaching them as one who had authority, and not as their scribes (Matthew 7:29, ESV). This raises an important question we need to ask ourselves. Do those I encounter sense I am an authentic person, not just in what I say, but in who I am as an individual? Could it be I was authentic, but somewhere along the line, I lost it?
It has intrigued me as I’ve examined King Hezekiah. In the first half of his kingship, he was superhero of spiritual life and leadership. At age 25, after his father had led the people away from loving and serving God, Hezekiah led a stunning spiritual reform among those in his kingdom. Hezekiah trusted in the LORD, the God of Israel. There was no one like him among all the kings of Judah, either before or after his time. He remained faithful to the LORD in everything, and he carefully obeyed all the commands the LORD had given Moses. So the LORD was with him, and Hezekiah was successful in everything he did (2 Kings 18:5-7a, NLT2). To be candid, that has been my overall perception of him. However, I discovered something happened within himself that resulted in a not so good last half of his life.
He continued saying and doing the right things, but spiritual cancer of some sort ate away his authenticity. Eventually, while his spiritual life continued to sound and look reasonably healthy, his spiritual life actually sounded as a hollow empty 50-gallon barrel. But Hezekiah did not respond appropriately to the kindness shown him, and he became proud. So, the LORD’s anger came against him and against Judah and Jerusalem (2 Chronicles 32:25 (NLT2). It also says he knew he had crossed the line with God and therefore essentially said “I’m sorry” but his subsequent choices revealed this response lacked authenticity. After Isaiah the prophet informed him of God’s strong judgement on his subsequent choices, there was no remorse. Instead, Hezekiah said to Isaiah, this message you have given me from the LORD is good. For the king was thinking, “At least there will be peace and security during my lifetime (Isaiah 39:8, NLT2).
Like cancer, pride first hollowed out his authenticity until he knew what was right, but had spiritually disengaged. Eventually, that leads to being a Christ-follower in name only. This alerted me to how easily I could begin to subconsciously claim past ministry accomplishments as my own—and in doing so, not even realize I had lost my spiritual authenticity. Without that, I would be like a noisy gong or clanging cymbal (1 Cor. 13:1b, NLT2). I don’t know how that possibility affects you, but for me, it motivates me to give myself more to loving and knowing God better through His Word. Jesus said the one who endures to the end will be saved (Matt. 24:13 (ESV). I look forward to hearing Christ say to me, Well done, good and faithful servant (Matt. 25:23a, ESV).